male writers

for tha comic-writing-lovebros out there:

• MALE WRITER: Ah, anniversary jokes are so funny. Because chicks always hate it when you don't remember anniversaries! A plus gold very original
• MALE WRITER: Mother in laws amirite?
• MALE WRITER: My male character who is an author insert of myself pines after a woman I used to pine after in high school. Then they have sex. This is good literature.
• MALE WRITER: Ugh female books are so romance filled
• MALE WRITER: And girl fanfics, so mary suey
• MALE WRITER: Now listen about this original middle aged man who is an expert in everything, suffers from ennui, looks like me, acts like me, and gets all the girls i want.
• MALE WRITER: She was sexy in an alluring, boring way, filled with purple prose and riddled with objectification
• MALE WRITER: If i make a female character parrot my misogynistic views, they cease to be misogynistic! Are you saying you don't respect my fake female characters opinions, feminists?
• MALE WRITER: a good action girl is one who looks hot at all times
• MALE WRITER: If the female main character got in an asskicking line, my work is Feminist with a capital F and no one can criticize me
• SPECIFICALLY WHITE MALE WRITER: Heroic tropes are so overdone. I'm going to create a boring white guy with stubble to be a completely original antihero no one has ever seen before TM.
• SAME GUY: It's original because he is a jerk who gets away with bad behavior, just like I wish i could.
• ANOTHER SPECIFICALLY WHITE MALE WRITER: It's in my universe to only have white men do things in my book. I mean, don't you care about historical accuracy
• SAME GUY: I mean, it's a generic fantasy verse with no real life time period equivalent and i haven't done any research, but i'm SURE that it's historically accurate. To that dark mideval dragon fighting europe period
• SAME GUY: Where in Europe? Who cares!
• MALE WRITER: There is no better way to introduce a female character to a male character than by him saving her.
• MALE WRITER: Characters hating each other is good sexual tension!
• MALE WRITER: One female character and five male characters is a good team balance
• MALE WRITER: If my female character chooses to act in a sexist tropey way, it's not sexist. In fact, because she CHOSE to do it, it is Feminist.
• MALE WRITER: I am original

bitter angry pompous cripple